Chives.

[They are Italian. He is not. Nobody speaks English by choice. They are the customers. He works at the shop. Everybody is tense.]

The Wife: You show us please where ricotta.

Him: Ricotta?

The Wife: Si, ricotta. Um…

[She turns to The Husband and gesticulates stereotypically. The Husband scrunches the very scrunched scrap of paper in his hand and murmurs in Italian.]

Him: [with relief] Yes! Cheese! Just here!

[It is a very small shop. They are stood in front of the cheese.]

Him: [tentatively] Is there anything else you need from me?

The Wife: Yes! Please also…

[The Wife’s eyes widen in bewilderment. The Wife and The Husband confer earnestly in Italian. The Husband scrunches the paper anxiously, while He looks on.]

The Husband: [optimistically] Um, erba cipollina?

[The Wife glares witheringly at The Husband. The Husband returns to silent paper scrunching.]

Him: …

The Wife: It is an ‘ERB. ‘ERB!

[The husband nods.]

Him: …

[He shrugs fearfully.]

The Wife: [gesticulating wildly] You can chop it!

Him: …

The Wife: Like the grass… It is like the GRASS! But an ‘ERB.

[His relief is palpable. He stands taller and smiles proudly, having solved the puzzle.]

Him: Ah! Spring onions! Follow me…

[They head towards the vegetables, passing the chives on their way.]

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One thought on “Chives.

  1. I respect Pope Benedict’s decision and the way he seemed to have placed the need of the church above his own. I’m sure it must have been a difficult decision for the Pope but he chose to stay out of the limelight so that the work of the church may continue. That’s a true man of God!

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